Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Right Next Door

I walked to the plaza next door to get my favorite smoothie, Peanut Butter and Banana. As I approached the door to the shop, I was having second thoughts. I knew that this particular shop made all of their smoothies with soy, an ingredient I try to stay away from (soy raises estrogen levels – not a good thing for a guy). But I still wanted my smoothie.

Two doors down, there’s another shop that sells smoothies. I get a lunch bowl there from time to time (they have a wonderful one with shredded carrots, purple cabbage, green curry sauce) and I knew they have smoothies, but I had never tried one. I asked the girl if she wouldn’t mind putting a scoop of peanut butter in their banana smoothie, and ended up getting a smoothie that, while not quite the PB&B I was used to, was a tasty and more hormonally sound alternative. And distinctly peanut butter-y.

I got to thinking about how this applies in a bigger-picture way. Many times, I’ll be facing a problem and not know the solution. The problem may be a biproduct of something that gives me value (as in the case of the delicious smoothie with the estrogen-raising soy). I might even put up with the value-giving thing (smoothie), because it’s working for me, even though the problem (soy) isn’t. But one day, I decide that the problem isn’t worth the value I’m getting, and I need a solution.

Funny enough, the solution can actually be right next door – and I just, for some reason, wasn’t seeing it. The minute I realized soy was going to be a problem, I could have hopped next door and got something just as good or better without the problem. But I didn’t think to do that, until today.

Why?

I wish I knew. But I do know that this is a common phenomenon. Many of us wrestle with problems, but don’t see the solutions that are right in front of our faces. Maybe this is a rude but useful reminder that we’re Human, after all. Or maybe there’s a more convenient lesson here.

Maybe it’s safe to start looking next door for a solution. Obviously, there are no guarantees. But how much time – and, in my case, testosterone – could we save if we were more open to the possibility that the answer could be waiting for us if we just… turned our heads?

Posted on by Rugged Troubador · 1 Comment

A Chat With Brian Charette

I went to see – well, to check out – a jam session in Studio City tonight. It was at one of the oldest clubs, and the oldest jazz club, in LA: The Baked Potato (I got the ham, corn and pineapple potato).

I went ahead and signed my name on the sign-up sheet. I was the first name on the list. I went outside and introduced myself to the keyboard player. His name was Brian. He lives in New York. He was very kind and approachable.

Brian turned out to be one of Keyboard Magazine’s top four… well, keyboardists. You can read an article he just wrote  (that I literally just found) here. He was one of these laid-back geniuses who seem totally avuncular – until they melt your face off.

As I was picking up my face from off the bar counter, I asked him some questions about practicing, about getting better.

“Well, what do you want to work on?” he asked me.

“Consistency,” I said.

“Ah, that’s big. It’s all in your body, and how you carry your body.

“Read the Tao De Ching,” he told me. “It’s all in there. That’s the Way. It teaches how you have to do all of these things with passion, but to forget about what you’ll get from them. That’s the thing – letting go of attachment.”

Yeah, letting go of attachment. Of course. How many times had I heard that one before?

“Getting better,” he concluded, “is not an adding-to. It’s a stripping away.”

Ah.

Now there’s something to ponder.

It makes sense. There’s a True Musician inside, a True Person even. And we all just want to get to it. So that’s what we’re learning. How to get to what’s already there.

“Just relax, man,” he said. “You’ll be fine. I can tell you, you’ll be fine.”

Well, Brian, OK. If you say so! Now, off to find a copy of the Tao.

And figure out this body thing.

 

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Manic-Expressive

My dictionary defines Depression as:

severe despondency and dejection, typically felt over a period of time and accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy.

I wish I could say I have no idea what this feels like, but unfortunately I’m all too familiar. In fact, I’ve dealt with depression intimately ever since my early 20’s. Hell, maybe even before. I was pretty emotional even as a kid. Then again, what kid wasn’t emotional?

There’s a medical definition as well, but it’s basically the same as the one I’ve just given, with some more specifics. I’m not going to argue with Merriam-Webster, but I’d like to propose an alternative definition to depression.

Depression, as I see it, is exactly what it is: a depressing, a closing in, a shutting off. It is so debilitating because it causes its host to do the opposite of what it was designed to do: to open up, to expand, to bloom. All energy is by its very nature expansive, and wanting to go out. Depression is the perverse opposite of this: a withdrawing in – but not in a way that serves the Being, but in a way that blocks it.

I wish I could say I knew the quick and easy cure. I could go on about emotions being like storm clouds, about how it’s all in one’s perception, but what good would that do? I’m not here to solve problems.

I like to think I’m not alone, however. In this big, scary, wonderful world, I like to think there’s others out there who knows what this contracting feeling is like – just as they know what the expanding feeling is like. I’d like to connect with those people – to get to know them by name, and to see what they’re all about. Not so we can commiserate with each other, NO! But so that we can begin to help each other. So that we can get out of the unnatural closing feeling, and get into the natural opening feeling.

Maybe we could go all the way to the other end of the spectrum. To a place where we’re open and blooming. That’s the way we’re supposed to be, it seems to me.

Manic Expressive.

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Practice is not always necessary.

If I am perfectly happy with my skills I already have, and am confident I can retain them without practicing, there is no need for me to practice.

If I find more joy resonating in what I’ve already accumulated, then the more important thing for me and for the world might be for me to start “being myself.”

I can “be myself” (innovate) purely and truly only if I am 100% OK with the skills and the information I have at hand. What this means is that I have an Inner Life that is at such a high vibration that whatever it is that I normally practice (piano, Portuguese, parasailing) resonates with that vibration.

Frequently, to be maintained, this Inner Life requires more than just the vibration. It also requires engaging with Life and with Higher Consciousness on many different levels and in many different areas. These could be anything from practicing yoga to eating blueberry pancakes.

So, as it turns out, “being myself” requires, for most of us, more than just “being.” It requires “acting.” It requires conscious and deliberate steps towards the things that makes us tick. Sometimes part of this is Practice, and sometimes it isn’t.

If we Act in the right way, we can start get closer to who we really are and what we can offer the world.

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

The Cure For Negative Thinking

Anger is almost always a useless resort. It really has nothing to do with the person(s) or circumstance(s) to whom it’s directed, and much more to do with thoughts going on inside of the victim’s own head.

Once this is realized, Anger subsides somewhat. It’s pointless to be mad, because whatever the person or circumstance is doing is what they’re doing, regardless. They’re over there, and the angry person is over here.

At this point it becomes a game to see how long the Anger can be watched, or watched for. we are the only species on the planet, as far as we know, that can watch for our own emotions. When we do, interestingly enough, the emotion loses a lot, if not all, of its strength.

At least, this seems to be true for negative emotions. Not so much positive emotions. I’ve noticed I’ve been happy before, but once I did, the emotion of happiness did not seem to grow weaker.

This is good news because it means that the cure for any negative emotion is simply observation. We can observe all of our emotions, and once we do, once we “watch for” them, we can, if I’m not mistaken, start to feel good more of the time, and to feel bad less of the time.

Which must be what everyone wants.

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Money Or Time?

A friend told me about a study done showing that most Americans have next to nothing in their savings accounts.

The actual statistic: 69% have less than $1,000 and 34% have no savings at all.

In other words, if your savings account has more than a grand in it, you fall into the unbelievably small 21%.

This got me wondering, is this really all about unwise financial decisions? Or could it have something to do with the actual ability to save? Having worked my share of odd jobs myself (TV salesman, cashier, waiter, dishwasher), I know something about how challenging it can be, having certain levels of income, to actually save money.

Saving money is not just the act of putting money into a savings account. As far as I’ve seen, there is really one major factor: Time.

Though I can’t cite statistics, I know that car payments, rent, mortgage payments, food, fuel, utilities, and insurance of all kinds, are facts. Never mind any expenses that do not fall into insurance, or recreational expenses of any kind. In order to account for all of these things, it seems safe to conclude that every American below a certain income level must devote a fair amount of Time to, well, Working. (And unless you’re very lucky, your job is not perfectly aligned with your creative or Artistic talents or Vision.)

Ironically, some of the very activities needed to save money (cooking at home, minimizing travel, designing and keeping to a budget) can be hard-pressed to fit into Time that’s already spent Working.

Maybe these far-out numbers reflect a deeper problem than poor spending habits.

Source: Yahoo!: “Here’s how much Americans at every age have in their savings accounts” by Kathleen Elkins

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

More On Growth

How can you tell where to direct your efforts?

By identifying the two or three things you least want to do. For me, it has been practicing my voice therapy exercises, and doing abdominal workouts.

It’s not because they were important that I delayed them. It’s more because they are kind of monotonous and not particularly fun. Actually, when I’m into doing them, I coast along easily. It’s getting started that is so grueling.

To me, it’s kind of ironic that the activities that generate so much resistance are the very ones that are often the most important for one’s personal growth. My two, in particular, are no exception to this rule. I simply can’t get excited about blowing bubbles into a cup with a straw or sweating on the floor with my legs in the air.

But today I just decided to bloody do it. OK, these were the two things I’m avoiding, and they also happen to be two of the most important things I must do for myself. So, damn it, I’m just going to do them.

Of course, once I got past the first five minutes, everything was fine and I wasn’t even thinking about how much I hated my life anymore. Well, that’s a bit of a lie – a part of me was still begrudging my bubble-blowing and ab-crunching. But at least I bloody did them.

Now, will I do them tomorrow?

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Where True Growth Comes From

The only way to ensure that progress is being made from one echelon to another is if pain is being felt. Not the kind of pain that renders a person immobile, but the kind that shocks the system just enough to make him stronger when he returns to his senses.

I used to have some misunderstandings about Growth. I thought it was something that, if you were consistent or even “passionate” enough, you could grow fast, and not really feel it. But the fastest growth is felt, and it feels downright painful.

True Growth must be accompanied by a certain kind of mentality, one in which you’re not really concerned with the bigger picture. Noticing the bigger picture can only overwhelm us and cause us to get discouraged. We might look at all the Pain ahead, and just decide that staying where we are is better.

In a way, we must be willfully ignorant. My PT told me today, “If you think about how heavy it is, you won’t do it.” This can apply to any undertaking. It doesn’t really benefit us to focus on anything other than what’s directly in front of us. We take the small actions, we push ourselves or allow ourselves to be pushed. But letting the gravity, or the density, or the scope, or the magnitude, of what we’re working towards, hold too prominent a place in our minds, is just too likely to throw us off.

And anyway, it’s still going to hurt.

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Reaching A Higher Level: Understand That Life Has “Layers” And “Seasons”

In order to reach a higher level at any Art, skill, Craft, Vision, stage of life, or Way of Being than one is currently at, one must have the discipline to “chunk away” at it, every day, until that higher level is reached.

I have a theory that this discipline doesn’t originate in a vacuum. I believe that it comes from a burning or insatiable desire to continue this process even through times of seeing few to no results. There must be a Light At The End Of The Tunnel, a strong feeling of what it would be like to get there, accompanied by a sense that one must Get There at all costs.

This feeling must be strong enough to last through disappointments, plateaus, and any forms of Resistance. It must represent a pull towards the Higher Level, one that overrides what Stephen Pressfield calls “lower natures”.

Whoever is on this path understands that, to go from the current level to the Higher Level could take an uncomfortably long amount of time. Furthermore, they would have to have the mentality of “chunking away” every single day. This part is especially important – the best way to build momentum when working towards a Higher Level is to take no days off.

None of this is overwhelming to the person truly on the path. He or she knows what she wants, and he or she is okay with never stopping.

Now here comes the “Big But”: but what if this feeling isn’t present? But what if the direction is unclear? But what if the desire is not so fiery?

Well, then, maybe the context needs to be re-examined. If that fire in the belly just isn’t there, if no path is visible, then maybe it makes sense to not be so concerned about that Higher Level.

Yes, human beings are built to evolve, to reach fuller and fuller versions of our potential. But what if this process was not always an active one? What if it unfolded in seasons, and there were seasons when specific action should be taken, and seasons when less action is better?

For anyone thinking about Visions and Higher Levels and evolution, it might seem counterintuitive to consider that to not have a plan could be a feasible way of doing things. But Life, like an onion, is a many-layered thing. Just because action is not being taken within one’s idea of the Art, skill, Craft, or Vision, does not mean action can’t be taken in other areas. There is a time to take action in non-Craft related areas, just as there is a time to focus on the Craft and let everything else fall by the wayside.

Maybe the best time to get down to the nitty gritty stuff that all Artists hate but that we must all face and do at some point is when we are not really feeling the grind. What if the Craft were just one layer in the onion, rather than the onion itself?

Yes, discipline is essential. Yes, it’s important to not skip a day. But what may be even more important is understanding that Life is Life. Sometimes it does make sense to stop, and trust that something will rush in to fill the void – for a season.

Posted on by Rugged Troubador

Beware of “Should”

The word “should” is more of a sentiment than a word. A golf ball flubs into the trees. “I should have kept my knees bent on the follow through!” A business investment tanks. “I should have been smarter about where I put my money!” A cheat in a diet. “I should not have eaten those cupcakes!”

The word “should” is a dangerous one because it interrupts our romantic notions about what we feel should actually be happening. We want to make a decision, and never falter. We want to stick with a commitment for life. We want to be braver than we’ve been before. A new day, a fresh start. Before and after. That was then, this is now.

Only catch is, Life doesn’t always work like that. In fact, more often than not, the way things unfold is anything but romantic. At least, not the “cut and dry” romanticism of stories and movies.

In a way, the stumbles and falls that cause us to want to use the word “should” are indicative of a more lovely sloppiness. The way Life actually works turns out to be weirdly more of a “should” than the “should” in our brains. And this, in itself, is kind of romantic.